The cat woke me up the other morning,
yowling. He hasn't done that in ages, and it usually means he peed
somewhere. He likes to let us know when he's guilty of something.
I imagine a little Richard Lewis cat
doing his neurotic stand up routine:
"Should I tell them I peed?...No,
I should go hide. No. Wait, I'll tell them, THEN go hide. I
DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DOOOOOO!"
But yeah, a big puddle of pee. A human
would be hard pressed to produce that quantity of urine.
The next morning, same thing, different
spot. At four in the morning. Before coffee.
Every night since, I lay in bed
wondering where I'll find it tomorrow:
Will it be on the floor,
Or behind the door?
Up on the table,
Or on the TV cable.
Maybe the DVD player,
Or just the radiator?
I took the cat to the vet, in case it
was a urinary tract infection. They like to have a urine sample, and
even offered to give me a syringe to suck the cat juice out of the
carpet. Thanks, but no.
Doc says he's probably stressed about
something. Or neurotic. Like I didn't already know that. So they're
giving him UTI meds just in case, and after that, if he continues to
pee around the house, they suggest Kitty Prozac.
For serious.
So now I'm powdering the cat's medicine
and mixing it into his softie food. Because you know how hard it is
to give a cat a pill? Are you overly attached to your body parts? So
while the cat's getting all the attention, the dog decided to up the
ante.
Now that he's a (mostly) a grown-up
doggy, he signals to go outside and do his business. Still, there are
times when he does nothing but make a sniff tour of all his previous
poos. He's also easily distracted by birds, squirrels, chipmunks,
moths, leaves and wind. So a half hour later, dog has done nothing,
so back in the house he goes.
I left the room for no more than five
minutes.
I smelled it before I saw it...sorry to
share, but this is the kind of smell that invades the nostrils,
conquers the sinus cavities, rapes them senseless, then settles in
for a nice extended vacation.
You're welcome.
Aaaand.....did I mention it was soft?
Do you know what that does to a long haired dog? I didn't have time
to give him a bath, and he was overdue for a trim anyway. So after
mopping him off with baby wipes, he got a real nice butt cutt,
Corgi-style.
Then I boiled my hands.
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