Friday, November 14, 2008

Don't Fight The Duck Fart

PROBLEM: Sandy thinks her system sends a report to AppSupportGeek's system. Sandy also needs to add a column to this report for 'number of duck farts per region'. So Sandy sends a request to the MajorManager to see if this is okay with his team.

MajorManager: “Can you jump on this problem and get a response back to Sandy?”

AppSupportGeek: “Sandy is mistaken. We don't receive this report. But it does sound like a report that the Department Of Avian Gas receives. Maybe it's theirs.”

MajorManager: “So..... are we okay with this?”

AppSupportGeek: “It's not our report. *sigh* Alright, I'll contact AvianGas, verify it's their report, and introduce the two parties so they can sort it out.”

....five minutes later

AvianGas: “Yes! This is a report we receive daily.”

AppSupportGeek: “Great. Can you get with Sandy? She needs to add a column to your report.”

....ten minutes later

MajorManager: “Do you have an update yet? Have we decided if we want the new column for duck farts?”

AppSupportGeek: “Dude, the report isn't ours. I told AvianGas to call Sandy and sort it out.”

MajorManager: “Yeah well, Sandy's boss called and he said it is our report. I need to know this is being handled.”

AppSupportGeek: “Fine. I'll call Sandy and have her talk to her boss. Or I'll talk to her boss. AvianGas should've been in touch with her by now.”

....fifteen minutes later

Sandy: “No, I haven't heard from AvianGas yet. Are you sure it's not your report? My boss swears it is.”

AppSupportGeek: “Well, you know, I've only been working on this system for 10 years now, wrote every interface for incoming reports, and I can honestly say I've never seen this one. There's also the much ignored fact that AvianGas said this report belongs to them. But then again, what the hell do I know? I'm just the geek.”

Sandy: “But MajorManager said you'd help meeeee.”

AppSupportGeek: “Good God, woman. Just tell your boss it's AvianGas' report! I have proof!”

Sandy: “Ooooh.... I don't know what I should do. Do you think you might need the extra column for 'number of duck farts per region'?”

AppSupportGeek: “Sure! Why not? I think it's a lovely idea. Glad you had the foresight to include our team in these discussions. I'll send your boss a nice email detailing how incredibly helpful you've been.”

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